Monday, December 9, 2013

Mrs. Yoy: On Probation

Mr. Yoy has informed me that I've been doing a crap job of documenting the recent happenings of the Yoys.  He has put me on a performance improvement plan and if I don't meet his specified goals, I think I may be out of here.

November 22nd was the date of my last blog entry, which Mr. Yoy was quick to point out was almost one month ago.

So what have I been doing with all my free time, you wonder?

1) Removing 15,000 photos from my encumbered iMac to the cloud.  You think I post a plethora of pictures to Facebook and Instagram, you should see the sh*t going down on my computer.  It's a guarantee that the Yoysers will resent me when they are adults.  And yes.  You really do need hundreds of pictures of your kids in the tub.  It never gets old.  Ever.

2) Binge watching Homeland. The season finale is Sunday and I'll be damned if Yahoo News spoils things for me.

3) Reading.  Yes.  You read that correctly.  I read two books in the past month.  They were fantastic reads and I don't regret the hours I spent in my cozy chair while my kids raised themselves.

4) Wrapping an obscene amount of Chanukah presents.  This can only be done after dark, which is usually when I write.  I tried casually to wrap a few presents while the boys were in the playroom, but as soon as they heard the unrolling of the tape, they were like moths to the flame.

5) Going to parties.  Look, I'm super popular.  I can't help it if I'm hosting things and attending things and being a Yoy about town.  I just can't.  My calendar has finally calmed down. This, coupled with the fact I ate and drank myself out of all my party dresses has given me the extra time I need to blog.

6) Laying in bed, staring at the ceiling and willing myself to take a shower.  It's cold.  I'm tired.  Enough said.

So there you go.  I'm riddled with excuses.  But really I'm just lazy.  And I promise to do better.  Please forgive me.


Typing away...

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