Yesterday at soccer, Aunt Yoy told us that at dinner the night before she had left her car running the entire time they were in the restaurant and then flipped when she couldn't find her keys when they were trying to leave. Maybe she locked them in her car? Maybe they were in her ignition with the car running? For an hour?
Mr. Yoy shook his head in disbelief. On our drive to lunch he commented that the two of us were engaged in some bizarre competition to one-up each other in incompetency. His statement really struck a chord.
Mrs. Yoy: I DROVE INTO THE WALL IN OUR GARAGE! I'M NEVER REALLY SURE IF I'M UP FAR ENOUGH.
Aunt Yoy: I ROLLED INTO A CAR AT CARPOOL AT SCHOOL!
Mrs. Yoy: I RAN INTO A POLE AT PIEDMONT HOSPITAL PARKING DECK! WHOOPS! THAT JUST JUMPED OUT AT ME!
Aunt Yoy: I TOOK OUT THE SIDE OF MY NEW CAR AT A PHARMACY DRIVE-THRU!
Mrs. Yoy: I SIDE SWIPED A PARKED CAR ON BIG E'S FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!
Aunt Yoy: I TOOK OUT A MAILBOX A MONTH AFTER I HAD MY CAR FIXED. PLEASE SEE THE NEW LINE RUNNING THE LENGTH OF MY CAR.
Mrs. Yoy: I RAN INTO A GIANT BOULDER AT THE EXIT OF LITTLE E'S SCHOOL THREE WEEKS AFTER I GOT MY VAN BACK FROM THE BODY SHOP.
Aunt Yoy: I LEFT MY CAR RUNNING WHILE I WENT INSIDE A RESTAURANT AND ATE DINNER. GOOD THING NO ONE STOLE IT!
I have to laugh, because it is so ridiculous.
And this is how I imagine a conversation between Mr. Yoy and Uncle Yoy goes:
Mr. Yoy: WHY CAN'T OUR WIVES DRIVE WORTH A SH*T?
Uncle Yoy: THEIR INABILITY TO DRIVE HAS COST US THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS.
Mr. Yoy: THEIR NEXT VEHICLES WILL BE RICKSHAWS.
I DO look good in yellow!