The morning rush has come and gone. For thirty minutes, I am a focused machine. I go through the daily grind of getting the Yoys off to the bus stop.
Today, we made it to the bus stop with about thirty seconds to spare. The Yoys are efficient, if nothing else.
As Big E boarded the bus, I noticed he had stepped in dog crap. Fresh. It had spread all over the bottom of his sneaker like butter on a biscuit. A million curse words bubbled up in my throat. Mostly because I have some bad neighbors who never pick up after their dogs. Ever. I have watched them out of the second floor window of my own home as their dog made on my yard. They usually peek around in suspicion and skulk off. It drives me bananas.
I yelled for Big E to stop moving. I stepped closer to grab him off the bus. But instead, I slipped in the mound of sh*t. In my beloved Ugg boots. If I had to rank my favorite things in life, especially in Winter, it would go: 1) Ugg Boots 2) Hot Showers 3) My Offspring. So you can imagine, my anger escalated. It's early. It's cold. I was livid.
I started rubbing Big E's shoes through the wet grass. It was still dark, so I was praying this was poop-free grass.
The bus driver asked me to run home to grab some paper towels, as their was poop all over the bus steps, and with the heat cranking at an ideal 75 degrees in there, the school bus was quickly becoming a hot box.
I left my Uggs outside, sorry sweet Uggs, ran inside the house, shouted out all my dirty words to anyone willing to listen, and grabbed a ton of paper towels.
The bus driver was busy trying to sweep the poop from the steps when I handed her the towels.
WHY WOULD ANYONE LEAVE DOG POOP THERE LIKE THAT?
She was dumbfounded. I told her in PG words that I had some sh*tty neighbors.
After a ten minute delay, they were finally off.
And I went home to unleash my frustration on Mr. Yoy, my community Facebook page, and you.
Popular posts from this blog
I bet you didn't expect to hear from me... At 8:45AM this morning, I had a very worried child wake me up. He was ultra concerned that we were not yet up. How were we going to stick to the schedule I had printed out? The schedule I printed out in attempt to convince myself that this homeschooling/quarantine would not be the dumpster fire, that deep down, I knew it would be. I don't normally sleep this late, I promise. But Mr. Yoy and I were up extra late last night, finishing off the Hunters. I fell asleep around 2AM. I checked my phone and I had a very special message from a very special lady requesting I resuscitate the Mrs. Yoy blog, at least for the time that we are locked in, as she needed some laughs. So here I am. It's a little after 6:30PM. No one in my house has died and I feel like I need some praise and validation. The morning wasn't so zen. 9AM was P.E. time per Little E and his militant schedule, so we went out for a walk/bike ride. We came back
I opened my eyes and had a moment that I thought I had overslept. That one second of panic that pumps your adrenaline so hard, you could flip a car. The sunlight that was beginning to creep into our bedroom had fooled me. Moments later, Little E, the schedule sergeant, bounded in to inform me we had to get up and go on our morning walk. Today I was a little more enthusiastic as I craved the fresh air. I threw on my quarantine uniform, leggings and a sweatshirt and met Little E in the hall. He had put on his full camouflage outfit, vest and sweatpants, and I had put on my camouflage sweatshirt. We perfectly coordinated, but didn't match, like early 2000s Destiny's child, but without the singing talent. We are the Jewish Duck Dynasty After our walk, the teachers' emails came flooding in with their real assignments. Phew. Tangible work. I was getting worried that I'd have two homeschool dropouts. I set them up at the kitchen island to work and that las
Day 65. I first want to say Happy Birthday to my best friend who would have been 44 today. I found a funny email exchange we had with each other back when we both first had our babies and had zero clue as to what we were doing. DOES THIS THING COME WITH AN OWNER'S MANUAL? The buildup has been immense, but this was the actual last day of school here in Cobb. Big E had his final Zoom call with his class. His teacher put together a video of them with baby pictures mixed in with their current pictures and I stood over Big E's shoulder and watched and silently cried. I left to grab a tissue and returned to watch the whole 5th grade video with photos of them starting as babies in Kindergarten and now as 5th graders. Again, I stood over Big E's shoulder and silently cried. He turned to look at me. I tried to play it cool. YOU CAN LEAVE NOW. Normally that would have hurt my feelings, but I'm so raw from everything, that I just numbly walked away to clean up