Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Would you like to make a donation to (insert today's hot cause here)?

Let me start by saying I am no scrooge.

Mr. Yoy and I donate plenty in charitable contributions each year.  (Tax returns available upon request)

I just don't like being put on the spot.

For example, I went nuts on this guy a few weeks back who parked himself at a major intersection by my house for almost two weeks.  I drive through this intersection at least twice a day.  So, if I gave this guy a quarter every time I drove through, essentially this man has turned a public street into a toll road.

After ignoring him for many days, I felt obliged to roll down my window as I was the first car in line at the light and he was making crazy eye contact with me.

He gave me his spiel for his cause.  I politely declined. Then he made some sort of doubting statement to the tune of:

YOU CAN'T TELL ME YOU DON'T HAVE A QUARTER OR TWO IN YOUR CAR.

Then I told him to apply for a job at Georgia 400 (the nice and abbreviated version of what I said).

If it is not this guy it is Publix or Costco or H&M (tsunami anyone?)

Today it was the checker at Costco.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO DONATE TO CHILDREN'S HEALTHCARE OF ATLANTA?

Internally, I laughed like a total psychopath for many, many minutes.  I caused SUCH a backup in the line.

Externally, I gave my standard no thank you.

You see, last summer, Big E took a nose dive off a train. The sound of his skull hitting the concrete still resonates in my head.  It scarred me.  Big time.

I rushed Big E to Children's Healthcare of Atlanta (CHOA) where they had him in and out in under an hour.  He briefly saw a nurse who applied some neosporin and a bandaid.

Wow, what a positive experience we had at CHOA.  We SO love CHOA.

Until we got a bill.  For $800.

WHAT THE WHAT?

I know the US healthcare system blows big chunks, but this was ridiculous!!

Mr. Yoy did his best to fight the bill, but they weren't budging.

We agreed to a payment plan where we angrily paid $80 a month until we settled our debt.

We actually just made our last payment this month.

And now they want me to make a donation?

Uh, I think we've donated enough, thank you very much. And don't make me feel bad about it.

This is what I must look like.

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