Monday, July 8, 2013
Operation Diaper Independence: Day 4
I have survived a sh*tty four days of no diapers.
If I was grading Little E, and let's face it, I always am, I'd give him a "C".
Today he had one accident. But it was a mega poop in his underwear. At our neighbors' house. And waited until I discovered it. So he gets many demerits for being shifty.
I have found over the past four days, the only time I am truly relaxed is when I slide those Cars Pull-ups over his chunky thighs minutes before bedtime. I can breathe again. Angels cry out HALLELUJAH from the heavens. My heart rate decelerates to an acceptable level for a woman my age. My deodorant stops working overtime.
I know it gets better, as Big E is rounding the corner to five and he goes to the bathroom without prompting and/or drama. Unless something so engaging is on the television. And then he just goes in his pants rather than miss a minute of Jake and the Neverland Pirates. Priorities.
I just want to fast forward this process and get there already. I don't even need a Delorean, we can make due with the Sienna.
I long for the day when I am not stalking Little E.
Eyebrows up? Are you thinking about maybe having to possibly go to the bathroom?
Grunts? Are you already doing the deed in your clean underwear?
Optical Illusions? Is that a shadow on your shorts or are you urine soaked?
In the meantime, I will continue to spew the potty questions every 15 minutes.
LITTLE E, DO YOU HAVE TO USE THE POTTY?
My nighttime savior!