Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Vomit: This week's theme at the Yoy house

Suspect: Big E
Height: Somewhere around 3 feet
Weight: Pushing 30 lbs, if he's lucky
Time: 12:45 am
Date: Sunday, June 19th

I had been asleep for about an hour.  Mr. Yoy was watching some crazy movie in bed.  He nudged me to say that he thought he heard Big E.  I came out of my coma for a moment, mumbled something, and fell back asleep.  Moments later I hear Mr. Yoy galloping down the hall to Big E's room.  Then I hear Mr. Yoy screaming for me.  I bolt out of bed and run into Big E's room.  Big E is crying hysterically.  From what I can see, there is vomit all over himself and his crib.  Dang!  I forgot my glasses.  I run back into our room, grab them, and run back into Big E's room.  Super mommy to the rescue!  Mr. Yoy starts the tub.  I bring Big E into the bathroom and stand him at the toilet in case there is anything left.  He is shaking uncontrollably.  It is pathetic.  He is done.  Mr. Yoy bathes him while I strip his bed and wash everything.  Big E relays how he threw up in his bed and saw Craisins.  They were actually half digested blueberries, but I give him points for looking.  I usually have an ironclad stomach, but the smell and the visual are making me queasy.  Mr. Yoy casually mentions that he dropped Big E when he first ran in there because when he picked him up, he didn't realize Big E was covered in vomit.  We read a couple of books and Big E goes back to bed and that is the end of the episode.  I, of course, couldn't fall back asleep until 4 am because my mommy adrenaline was through the roof.

Suspect: Little E
Height:  A little over two feet
Weight: Pushing 30lbs, I'm sure
Time: 7:45 am
Date: June 20

I was feeding Little E his morning bottle.  He was laying in my lap all relaxed.  He was about finished with his bottle when he gagged and out came three huge surges of formula.  It started pooling on the couch.  I screamed for Mr. Yoy and a giant towel.  He came running downstairs to the rescue.  We comment on how gross our kids are becoming.  We throw Little E in the tub and rinse him off.  Poodle gets to work on any formula I have missed.  She is nasty.

Suspect:  Little E
Height: A little over two feet
Weight: Pushing 30lbs, I'm sure
Time: 7:00 pm
Date: June 21st

I had just fed Little E his dinner.  It started out as a hard boiled egg, sweet potato, and avocado.  It ended up a blended mess that was perfectly coating Little E's face, hands, and hair.  I was taking him upstairs to give him a much needed hose down.  I must have pressed on his stomach, because out came part of dinner.  Good lord, I cannot get a break this week!  Again, Poodle was right there to clean up.  Note: a warning for friends that come over - don't let this dog lick you, just saying.  Little E started crying, which continued through bath time.  I started sweating.  There is something about your baby crying nonstop which really stresses you out.  Big E did not help.  His tub antics included dumping cups of water on Little E's head.  

Suspect: Poodle
Height: 14 inches at shoulder
Weight: Too much
Time: Unsure
Date: Unsure

And last, but not least, the dog.  She has been leaving me little piles all over the upstairs carpet.  They are small, but they stain if I don't find them right away.  I'm seriously debating leaving the front door open and just seeing what happens...

I'm praying the remainder of the week stays vomit-free.  I can stomach a lot of crazy stuff, but even Mrs. Yoy hits her limit.

On a side note, I'm in the market for a poncho.  

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