Post Baby Bod

This phrase makes me cringe.

Today's entry isn't about something specific the Yoys did, except maybe ruin my body.

I was on today getting my daily dose of brain rot, and I came across a picture of actress Keri Russell. She was ten days post baby delivery and out on the street looking carefree and happy.

Good for her.  Maybe she just ingested 27 gallons of caffeine and was able to put herself together, shower, and take a walk.

But the little news blurb wasn't about her being out and about.  It was about her "slender post-baby bod."

I hate this sh*t.  I know I shouldn't read it, but it just infuriates me that it is out there.  That people actually are writing about how this woman looks flipping fantastic less than two weeks after she gave birth.

I wish I looked this good before I ever had kids and was in the best shape of my life.  But, I didn't.

But she's an actress.  And she probably has a chef.  And a trainer.  And a nanny.  And a wet nurse.  And a night nurse.

It doesn't matter.

As a new mother, you are an emotional train wreck. You've gone through the most traumatic, yet wonderful, event of your life.

You are not sleeping.

You are not showering.

You have hemorrhoids.

You are afraid to go to the bathroom.

You have the mother of all periods.

You have to feed an alien 24/7.

You have five minutes of free time to poke around the internet and you stumble across a picture of skinny Keri Russell and you burst into tears.

You wonder if she is wearing a full body spanx, as it doesn't seem anatomically possible that this woman just gave birth.

I remember a few weeks after Little E was born, I escaped to the nail salon to get some much needed pampering.  The lady doing my nails asked me when I was due.

I snapped back at her that I just had a baby.  But I couldn't be mad.  I really did look about 5 months pregnant.  This sucked.  As I looked at my reflection in the mirror, I held back tears.

And let's not forget about this guy.

I'm not trying to hate on Keri Russell.  Good for her for looking awesome.

I just hate how the media makes such a big deal out of it.

Cut all of us new(ish) mommies some slack.  Let us enjoy our new babies AND a Willy's burrito.

I will now step down from my soap box.

Thanks for listening.

I am too embarrassed to post a picture of me ten days post delivery.  I look like a meth addict.


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